Day 5: June 28th

CURRENT WEIGHT  250 lbs (6/24 weigh-in)

GOAL WEIGHT 190 lbs

Pouring rain so I did not work out again this morning.  But my energy is coming back and I have to go to the hospital and get a lot of tests and meet with the doctors after.

My kids or wife still have not checked on me since I started blogging.

I just got back from hospital and worse than expected.  I not only do I have hypothyroidism but I have fluid in my heart and… wait for it… three masses that look like cancer on my thyroid, stomach, and lung.  After the docs told me I am crazy I am not opting for surgery or chemo.  I am going to do this holistic and vegan.  I am now hoping my diet not only rescues my depression but my ‘masses’.  The wouldn’t say cancer but said likely cancerous.  WTF?

When I told my wife she didn’t care.  Didn’t offer to help.  I am not sure why I should try and not just enjoy myself.  I should booze and eat and fuck whores.  What I am trying to live for?  An empty studio apartment all alone.  Suicide seems generous right about now.  I am seeing the alternative medicine doctors and nurses next week.  Maybe I don’t go and give up.  I’ve had enough of this life.

My meals:

Celery, raw broccoli, soaked and cooked lentils, warmed mushrooms and onions, cucumber,green peppers,and raw unsalted almonds.  For dinner I had again my blend of some power greens, carrots, blue berries, and an apple.

On day five, 319 more to go after.

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